it's to the point

where i just laugh.





hahahahahahahhahaahahahahahhaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaahahahahhaa.

sugar highs from cotton cady & "palola" oye, let's hope tomorrow is a good day. :) have a good week people

so i was reading through all of my twitter updates, and that one makes me laugh, because on a serious level, sugar drives me up the wall.  i dont know why, i can drink cups and cups of coffee and be completely normal.  but, no, one scoop of ice cream, and i'm insane.  I'm weird, i know...

i figure now that the internet works at work, it will nudge me to blog more.  It's 10:33, and i get off at 2:30, tight.  I'm going to meet up with chinako today, and hopefully go on a photo adven.  i'm stoked.  :)

december 27, 2008.

I'm at work. That's right, the internet is working today, and i'm stoked about it. My mom just dropped off a white mocha, and i'm drinking it, with my heater under my desk. I work again tomorrow 9:30 to 2:30, not that bad. I'm supposed to go on a photo adven with chinako tomorrow, i'm super stoked about it.

Right now, i'm reading about buddsism, it's funny how a religion can fit someone so well without them even realizing for their whole life. I need to go shopping, i'm in need of some new cute clothes. I'm hoping I can be let off a little early tonight, as in within the next hour.

"i'm down for beer tonight."-lk
"i'm down, are you buyin'?"-jg
"...yeah, i'll buy"-lk
"i wanna comeeee..."-ks
"what kind of beer are you down for miss klein?"-jg
"newcastle."-lk
"awww miss klein, you shouldn't have said that, i love newcastle!"-jg.
i love my friends&tonight.
<3laurenklein

it makes me sad

that i'm sad.








You know?
i'm only a little disappointed in myself.
i hate letting myself get like this.
i need to do a mind cleanse.

goodbye night.

oh & merry christmas.

i'm freezing!!!!!!!!

I'm so cold i'm laying in bed wearing my uggs. My room is the room in the house that during the summer is always the hottest, and during the winter is always the coldest. It sucks. But anyway, today was cookie day with the cousins, and it was awesome. I missed them a lot, they make me really happy. Tomorrow, er well, today i'm going to try and go to venice and buy my christmas presents for people. I still don't know what to get some people though. I'm so tired and warn out. Tomorrow/today, will be a good one.
<3laurenklein

sleep forever.

I got home at a ridiculous hour and couldn't stop throwing up. I set my alarm for 5:00AM and woke up at 8:05AM and my shift started at 8:00AM. I left, got to work, was super late, and sat in the bathroom for 5 minutes to barf more and i was already late.
I dont know what's going on with my body, all I want to do is sleep forever.
I figure half of this is mental.
and i'm not asking/telling my mom to help me, because she'd freak out, she actually would have probably taken me to the ER last night, it's kind of funny how crazy my mom is, it's because she's a nurse and is just insane. So i'm just sufferin'.
ferck.


i'm a freak
goodnight.

no title.

No photo.


The universe and life is hilarious how it works. It's possible that i've gone crazy on a serious level. Which I pretty much just did to myself. I like you, end of story, maybe i should forget about, which is what i've been trying to make myself do, but you can't help your feelings. This is whyyyyyy i'm crazy. Over time it will fade, but over time when it doesnt fade, i'll feel like telling you, and that's what will drive me crazy, because i can't.

I guess I'm feeling like spending some alone time today, but sometimes i hate alone time, because it makes me think, about myself, and drives me insane. I just want my life to be free of dumb situations! SCREW THE UNIVERSE.

please, i'm done.
laurenklein.

reflection?

I needed a good one of my tattoo.

Venice beach.
Sushi in downtown fullerton.





So i'm in a mood to write a blog. It's freezing, i'm chilling, and this rainy weather, always gets me thinking. Bright eyes, tourist trap, right now, it sounds pretty good. Today was a legit day, hung out with some people down in la habra, end my night with julie kevin and them, thanks for my mickeys jewlee<3 i love you. Tomorrow i'll probably wake up and have to try and remember my day today. I've had a lot of life learning lessons lately. I figure life is full of them, so i need to get used to it. I've realized the world isn't all just peace and love(on a serious level). Not everyone is all going to get along. True story. Uhmmmmmmmmmmm. hmm. whatelse. i dont know anymore. My day was a good one, i dont know if it owuld have been the same without the rain, ya know? Oh well, anyways. I dgaff, i've decided i'm offically a bro. I wish i didn't stress and think so much. I'd like to get over it.

goodnight.
laurenklein

I need a self evaluation. because i've just been too down on myself lately.

I am lauren ashley klein.
I love who i am, and wouldn't change a thing about myself.
My mom is Filipino, my dad is Hungarian/Jewish.
I talk too much sometimes.
I'm a nice person, too nice, to the point where i apparently attract desperate guys.
I wear my heart on my sleeve, but currently, i can't, because it would make things ridiculous.
I love music. Any genre, it just has to be legit, in my opinion.
I'm extremely open minded, and like to hear what others have to say, i'm genuinely interested.
I have a lot of friends, but i'm only close to a few.
I love animals, minus reptiles.
I don't eat red meat, i am a pollotarian
I love hanging out with my friends, but i love being alone.
I over think things.
Before i die, i'd like to:
travel the world
have someone write a song for me
camp with pandas
visit the Philippines and Israel
I believe that everything happens for a reason, and that there's a reason for everything.
I wish that i could read people, but sometimes i just can't.
It's been forever since i've liked anyone.
I trust people way too easily, but, i dont at the same time.
I want a legit boy in my life, that can just be there for me, and understands, it's harder than it seems.
I love photography, everything about it.
I'm almost game for anything, unless it's just dumb.
I love being outside.
I can't make up my mind.
I'm awesome.

Love,
Laurenash

sigh.

Alright as of late, i've been just cruisin. Honestly, i like where i am at my life, even though it is just at a stand still. I feel like my life should be how it is right now. I'd like to just say, i love all of my friends, and without them i would be so bummed on life. SO BUMMED. And i'm just not down to feel bummed. I've made some pretty tight friends i have a feeling we'll be friends for a long time, which is always good. I'm tired and i don't feel like driving to school to work on a project. First i have to shower go to michaels then go to school. EHHHH not down. Yesterday Julie and i went to second spin, and i've decided, i'm going to start buying a cd a week. Or try to atleast, i have no mon! But, i just bought three, so that works. I'm offically in the friend zone guys. It's a bumma!
<3

updatin'

So, it's been a while, and i've decided, i'm going to start bloggin' again. So, i have yet to have a sober day this week. Today's looking good, but i know either before work, or after i'm bound to break it.

My parents are being ridiculous again. Hi, i'm eighteen years old, you don't pay for anything, i go to school, i go to work. Do you REALLY have anything to say to me? No, you honestly don't, but i'll deal with it, because i get to live here for free, and you have food at the house sometimes which means, i don't have to spend money on it. I'm honestly just over it. They are going away next weekend, and I'm stoked about it. Kickkking back.

I don't know, I at first didn't want to admit to liking you, now, i'd like to tell you. But, i dont know, i feel friendzone. And, friendzone, is not where you want to be when you like someone. It's a bummer. But, in time i guess. And this is why, i havent liked anyone in 4 years, i forgot how much it would mess with me. I don't know, i'm over telling you how i feel.

Cool.

ARRRRRRGH.

i know that picture really sucks.  but it was taken from a roof top in san fran.  How I love love love that place.  COLLEGE started yesterday, petitioning is what I have to do to get in.  Oye, whatever.  I feel so tired emotionally.  Hate ems.  Oh well, I feel like I should be seeing mae soon, this time last year, it was like one big mae party in the summer.  But neh, they're taking over the east coast.  thanks guys.  

I miss my mae fam. What's up with that?  I dont know, i'm nostalgic.  Nostalgia and holding back tears, are, in my opinion, the worst two feelings ever.  

Kay, time to get reads. for school. 

<3peaceout.

I really don't like people.

New job, since a few weeks ago, Color-Me-Mine, while still working at my old job.  I know, hey, I'm not complaining, just saying, I'm learning to deal with all different kinds of people.  My boss's mom is the owner of the store.  My boss's mom, is the owner, and thinks she is God, she thinks she is better than everyone else, "You, come here."  I'm sorry, I have a name, it's Lauren, look, see, my name tag?  That's what i really wanted to say to her, but i didn't.  At my other job, I do a lot of nothing, but what I do, do, is probably one of the most important things in the whole store.  It's cool, it's life.  But today, after work, i went to get my car washed, cool, awesome, nice clean car.  What?  Get home, scratches on around my car, both sides, ridiculous.  I called, and spoke to, "George" pronounced, HORE HAY.  He could possibly be on of the dumbest human beings i've had a conversation with over the phone.  YOU are paying for my car to be repainted.  And yesterday, I before work, i got in a fight with the parents, but it turned into something that contained tearing up, and deep convo. about how I am approaching the biggest milestone in my life, surprisingly this didn't come from my mom, it came from dear old d a d.  I dont know, really?  Anyway, when I talked to HORE HAY he told me to come before 730, right?  So i was going to meet my mom there so she would know what was going on, i had to go back to the car wash and have them look at my car, my mom got there before me and told me that they had cones up as if they were closed.  So i call, and some guy tells me that they are closed, and i talk to HORE HAY, he confuses himself, but then remembers oh wait, we DO CLOSE at 630, we OPEN at 730, HOREHAY, OH HAIL NO.  So i guess i'm going back tomorrow with my dad, haha this should be fun.  On my way back from driving to the carwash, after finding out they were CLOSED, i was freaking out about orientation/college, work, my ticket/courtdate, and the scratches all over my car, blasting Sherwood, and I pull up beind a car that has "Harvest Crusade" stickers, and their license plate said, "WWJD"  I didn't really know what to think, so i just laughed, and continued to drive home.  I read something about chronic stress disorder in a magazine yesterday.

peace

laurenklein

Lately, i've been fed up, tired, nostalgic, trying to keep the positive energy flowin'.  It's hard at times to stay positive.  I'm fed up a little with my parents, i'm really kind of an adult now, so stop worrying so much, and let me live, like you taught me how, like you raised me.  Honest, i love my parents, they are amazing human beings for dealing with so much, but cut me some slack, i know what's up, i know how to take on life from now.  I miss my florida lovelies so bad, i miss them, it's ridiculous, i hope i get a visit soon.  I don't know, Wendy is strange, she told me these things, & none of it's really been so true, so far.  But, i'm young, maybe it wasn't such a good idea to have gone to her, i don't really have my mind grasped around something so certain, it's kind of everywhere.  this blog is honestly about nothing, and just whatever comes to my mind as i'm writing this.  I have a headache, and i never really get those.  8:00-5:00 two different jobs.  Hello adulthood.  I've also realized, i have a hard time trusting people.  How do I know you really feel this way about this?  Or how do i know you won't tell anyone this?  Or how do i know you won't just be there for me for a few days, and then stop after that.  I am pretty tough, dealt with a lot of crap from a lot of people.  It's not that I can't handle being treated like this, it's just that i hate it.  anyways, this was a ridiculous blog. goodnight.

laurenashley

Lately...

So, thursday was my last day of high school.  Thank God.  It was glorious.  Anyway, I've decided that I'm done dealing with people's(they're supposed to be my friends) crap.  First of all, you think that it's okay, to treat me like crap, and only call me or talk to me, when YOU need something.  Not for my friendship or anything.  Second of all, I'm sorry that you are going absolutely no where in life, I apologize for that really I do.  I'm so sick of you guys I'm sick of it.  

So tomorrow is graduation practice, and since i've cut it out with all my friends, i'll be alone at it, alone at graduation, celebrating it, with, my family.  That's all that matters, I love my family.  So anyway the yesterday I had a hang out sesh with cookie and chinako, it was a good day at american app. the observatory, karma coff.,   amoeba.  i loved it.

june 4, 2008

Woke up, got dressed up for a mock interview in econ.  Changed, failed a vocabulary test, socialized dealt with fake friendships, left early actually ate a few bites of chicken, came home, back to school, took pictures, came home, grandma told me to get the "things" aka my effing moles on my face removed and asked why it didnt bother me,waited for a pointless tutoring session, cried, realized my dad... really... doesnt care... picked up court, went to play volleyball, got kicked out of the sports center, came home, rode my bike, did homework, broke down, cried, was forced to tell my mom why i was crying, and she told me if i didnt tell her that i was supposed to sleep on the couch by their room, because they always fear that i'm going to harm myself, again.  i'm done.

So yesterday I went shopping with the mom.  We went to the district, and it was freezing, and smelled like chimneys with Christmas sounding music in the background.  I told my mom it felt like christmas, and it made me sad.  What's with the weather being 90 last week, to freaking 50 this week?  Really Jesus, really?  Anyway, i'm over everything, and i give up.  Really though.   It's fine, you try to be a nice person, but i just waste my energy because people aren't nice back.  I'm trying, alright?  Get outttt.  Anyway, i should probably stop with this, two weekends in a row, i'm on a streak?  Not in a good way either.  I will hopefully find the time to write in this as graduation is approaching.  but for now, i will say goodbye. 

<3laurenash

It's only 9:14 AM, i've been at work for an hour and it feels like it's been 5. Yesterday was a freaking coming together of the universe. How does Wendy know something about myself that i do not? Maybe everything was just so far put in the back of my mind. I dont know, i am now going crazy, everytime i remember what she said about everything i freak out, i need to listen to this tape. ASAP, does any one have a tape player? My freaking life, miley cyrus just came on the xm radio, can she not be 5 years old and richer than my whole entire family combined? Thanks freak. Anyway, i'm trying to distract myself and work on my english project. But it's not working, maybe wendy just pulled that out, because it's kind of the only dude i'm talking to, she just probably didn't understand the relationship, yeah... that's it... she doesn't get it, and the universe is wrong wrong wrong. and i hate putting myself in freakin' awkward situations.
thanks guys. thanks
-lor

Jacob Marshall.

Jacob Marshall.
Originally uploaded by laurenklein

i'm just testin' out this new blog this photo feature.

& that means, he'll still be in your heart?

So yesterday I had a family picnic, with all my cousins.  We sat and ate, and played around at the park.  One of my cousins, he's older than me, has 3 daughters, and a wife.  He's going to Iraq, as a mercenary, for 7 months.  His youngest daughter is a year old, and his oldest is 4.  My cousin was explaining to me how he was telling his oldest about his trip so far away, for such a long time.  He had said that she already had an idea of what was to go on.  And she was telling him about her grandpa (his dad) who lives in Utah, and she said "You'll still be in my heart, like your dad lives so far away, and is still in your heart."  So, I teared up a little, this 4 year old girl, trying to deal with such a difficult thing, something I wouldn't even at my own age, wouldn't be able to handle.   

Wizbang, westwood, traff.

So today, I drove up to Westwood, and met up with Chinako, and we talked, laughed, and almost cried, maybe we did?  I don't remember.  Anyway, it was definitely needed, because this whole week, i've been on the floor.  And a little sad.  But, i've come to realization, that if you aren't upfront about things, and the way you feel, it really can hurt a person inside.  Both ways.  And relationships, rather it be a friend relationship, or significant other type of deal, it's a give and take thing. 

_______________

I am censored by my Mother.

goodnight.

geez,

Honest to Blog?

Today my senior class went to Universal Studios, I decided to stay home from that, because, well, Universal Studios is sketch. and a waste of money.  So I had originally planned on driving down to Huntington and taking pictures along PCH and what not.  But before that I went over to Amanda's house in the morning, and hung out with her and Julie.  After a few hours I decided to drive on down there.  Whenever I drive to Huntington I always pass a "USED CAMERA" store, and i've always wanted to go in and check it out, since I had time today, I finally was able to.  I was just browsing, honestly not looking for anything, and the guy who was working was kind enough to answer my 20 questions about the wide angle lens/fish eye.  He let me try out a fish eye lens, and was telling me about this certain one, and told me it was rare, and that he couldn't believe someone had brought it in.  I had some extra cash, and i've always wanted to buy a fish eye, and it seemed like a good time to finally purchase one.  Funny how things happen like that.  After I left the store, I walked over to the park across the way, and played around a little, then I tried to go to the Huntington dog beach, but there was too much traffic, so I decided to drive on down to Balboa, which by the way, i'm not a huge fan of, but today for some reason it was different. 

PEASH.

my freaking life.

I'm currently feeling emotions right now, crying as I'm writing this, like a human being... I've been told that that's a good thing.  Tears have filled my eyes, and it was fine before when I  was with Cookie and Chinako on the way home from Arizona.  But, i'm just alone and sad now.

My four whole years in high school, have all led up to the next few months.  I don't know what to say, or how to say it, so this is going to sound dumb.  

I'm 17, I was 14 when i started listening to mae.  I don't know how to put it, but they have effected my life so much.  From their lyrics/music to the people i've met, Cookie and Chinako,  i can't express how much you both have helped me with my random time in life/struggle.  You guys understand everything and are both amazing people.  Chinako, i want everything to work out, I need you to please do everything to help make it work.  I know you think other wise, but, i really want to see this work, i'm so sad about it right now, the both of you, please.  Cookie, you are really my sister, i'm serious, you are full of insight, and are helping me not turn into a loser.  When you told me about when you were driving away from vegas, and you had turned around and realized that everything would be different, that's how i felt today, you guys have no idea how these whole four days really have changed my life.  FYI, i'm sobbing worse than in the car right now.  Honestly you are the two best people that i know.  Cliche or not, i swear to you that if i ever let myself loose you guys as friends, I would die. 

 & Dear benj/dad, i'm glad you guys adopted me before I turn 18.  Anyway, for me, and I'm pretty sure it goes for Chinako and Cookie as well, you had our night end on an awesome note, and made me feel a little bit better about being a teenager in todays freaking world.  I hope you know that you are a good guy, and have a good heart.  Thanks.

If heaven and hell decide that they both are satisfied.

I wish my mood matched my photo above.  Today has been rough, i'm waiting for an hour to pass so i can depart from my house and get on my way to Los Angeles to go watch Mae preform.  Today kind of sucks, i'm stressed out, and my eyes are swollen like no other, i look like i've received 1 hour of sleep, and i might just pass out.  I hope tonight is good, as is the next three days.

Goodbye.

weekend ended.

I went to the OC swap meet, walked around, purchased some 70's sunglasses.  Later on I went to the Angels vs. Texas Rangers game, it was awesome.  My dad and brother always have the good seats, right behind the angels dugout, my sister and i were stuck outfield, still pretty decent seats by vladdy.  anyway,  it was fun, i enjoyed it.  And tonight i'm going to the Rolling Stones in IMAX, with my dad.  

I don't want next week to come, and I don't want it to end.

<3lata.

Danceeee-ish@#$#^%&.

School at 9:30, and I have time to kill. Alrightty, I hate school, I have to serve two detentions by friday before i get a saturday school, because i'm normal and never want to go back to 5th period, not my fault. Anyway, i've been wanting to graduate more than anything right now, can this just happen already? Anyway, turkish goldsss at 8 in the morning are the best, by the way. In english i'm supposed to research a person, we're like writing a paper and doing this whole project about them. I'm torn between John Lennon and Gandhi... Or maybe Syd Barret, either way, i'm looking forward to it a little. Whatever... There is this movie that i want to see, Darjeeling Limited, it looks really good. In film analysis, we're watching the Star Wars trilogy, and comparing it to the movie, American Grafiti, i was mostly absent for the American Grafiti film, but it's neat to see all the different themes Star Wars had, like relgions, brotherhood, letting go, etc. Anyway, i'm going to go and listen to some Meg & Dia, the besttttt.

<3

Cyrus.

Yesterday was an adventure.  Breakfast in Newport, hanging out in LA, beach cruising with miley.  That's all i'll say for this entry.

<3

Break da ice.

I’m sitting in the lobby of my hotel, “The Hotel” sister hotel to Mandalay Bay.  It’s so tight,    i love it.  There are drunkards sitting in the bar next to me, it’s funny watching old men topple over themselves.  Before we arrived we had visited my grandma in the hospital, she says we made her night, we surprised her, because she didn’t know that we were coming.  I missed the rocket summer show/we shot the moon show tonight to be in vegas for two nights.  Not being of age, and having people here be so strict about the drinking/gambling age, there’s nothing to do here in Vegas.  Except the pool at this hotel is pretty nice, I'm going to try and catch some rays tomorrow, get all tan.  I’m stoked to stay in my room tonight, apparently all the rooms here are suites, sweet.  I also enjoy watching women my mother’s age prance around in mini dresses with pounds of make-up on, it’s quite entertaining.  I recently purchased Super Bad, I loved that movie, in all it’s raunchiness.  Michael Cera is a babe.  I loved him in Juno, though his characters were somewhat similar, it still was awesome.  I blog out of boredom.  I’m tired and sick, sick and tired.  

Peaceeeeeees.

laur.  

homie G's in the heezies.

Good night!  What has been happening here.  Well, i'm writing to you from my brother's temperpedic bed, as to which, i'm pretty sure, screwed up my back.  Anyways, it's now 10:56 in the pm, and today was a very blah day, as was the day before, and well, the day before.  I wanted to rejoin swimteam again this year, but there's only one coach for three teams, and, she said it was full.  There goes that, now i just need to not die from being so unhealthy.  I talked with Cookie today, she was in japan with Chinako, and some guys in this band called mae... yeah, i know, weird name, right?  Well, i'm jealous and wish i could be out of the country, good traveling to you two, and come back with amazing stories and photos.<3> On a side note, my grandma and uncle emailed my mom yesterday about the college, UNLV, the university in las vegas, and that they were adding a journalism media school there, and that i should consider going and that i could stay with them...  That'd be pretty tight, you know?  But, i'm sticking with my master plan, OCC Photo school two years, then transferring to Northridge or another good journalism school.  We'll see!  Where ever life takes me.  I'll go with the flow.

peter bjorn & john on the tv.

I'm sitting in the family room with peter bjorn & john playing on the tv.  They are amazing live, and i'd like to go see them, anyways, I basically love chillin' time.  Though I have some econ homework to finish, that stuff is really hard, i dont understand it.  Whateverrrrr, i'm just procrastinating, and wanting it to be friday night already.  i have to serve a "saturday" school tomorrow, echk.  i'm annoyed.  You know what, I really miss playing volleyball all the time, i really do.  it bums me out i don't play anymore.  anyways, the other night we had our "Senior munch" at medieval times.  I wasn't really looking forward to this very much, but it was an awesome time.  "Green machine!"  it rocked.  anyways, i'm going to peace out!

Well, eff.

Hello.  I had spent last night at my cousin's house, to get away from all the chaos.  It was a nice time spent with my cousin, aunt, and uncle.  They were really there for me in my time of need, do i make things sound more serious then they are most of the time?  Not this time though.  My aunt prayed with me, and for the first time in a while, i felt a spiritual connection with God.  Because lately, i've been so distant, like you can't even imagine.  Everything happens for a reason, that's basically a "quote" i live by, even when things are really fucked up and out of control, it happens for a reason.  Just like what's happening right now, and why we lose the friends we do, you may not know it now, but you will later on in life.  I suck at writing, but I enjoy venting and things like this.  

I've been trying to repatch(?) my old relationships with friends.  I've had too many relationships that are ended or not really talked about for the lamest reasons, kind of laziness i guess.  And since i've been trying to become a better person, this helps.  A few friends are willing to start talking again and some really just don't care about it/you and like to hold grudges.  Or when your friend gets upset with you, and stops talking to you right on the spot, but won't tell you why she's mad or what you did was wrong.  It makes me feel like a bad person.  But I figure, if you're going to act like that, why do i need you in my life?  I don't.  

I'm checking in.

For a reality check.

Just blogging now, flickr, and the photo myspace.   I'm having an awful day.  Please be thankful for your family, and your situation if it's a good one.  Please.